Today marks the last day of SGC’s stay at Intersekt. We have used the place for seven full years; years of witnessing God’s great goodness to such undeserving sinners as we are; years of seeing Him at work—up close and mightily. It was while we were in Intersekt that I personally transitioned from being an idealistic incoming college student to a more sober, calmer, and grace-reliant adult. That building has witnessed so many drastic changes—not just in my life, but in the life of the church as a whole. We were in that building when we’ve lost friends and loved ones; we were there when the Lord has so graciously added new friends and loved ones into the fold, too.
Seven of the Youngles were able to stay at Intersekt for our last overnight there yesterday to pack things up and designate which box goes where. I was super privileged and blessed to have been able to come (thanks to Euma for picking me up AND taking me back to my place which is an hour drive away). It was an all-nighter kind of packing. I slept for two hours at 3-5AM, but the rest really stayed up all night and day. (Except Emman; I think he also slept at 3AM.)
It was 12-ish midnight when we stopped huffing and puffing around to have some coffee and when I have suddenly been asked, “What are you thinking?”
I realized I had been staring intently into space. At that time, I couldn’t quite grasp and articulate yet what I was thinking about. But after this morning’s conversation with James and Hapi (and brewed coffee, of course), I’ve had some time to process each train of thought. (Hapi said I should write a blog about it. Haha!)
I know that this drastic change in our church makes a lot of the members feel sad and lost, and it’s totally valid to be nostalgic. Moving out has always been a growing pain, no matter the situation.
But that’s exactly what it is. A growing pain. A pain that is necessary for growth. And seeing how the Lord has been tremendously at work in SGC for years, and even more so during this community quarantine season, I couldn’t help but look forward with excitement at the things that are yet to unfold in our church life.
This period of separation among SGC members has caused no little pain; it has made many of us shed not a few tears. But it has also become a huge magnifying glass that revealed people’s hearts, minds, motives, and priorities; it has revealed our deepest affections, whether to God or to anything else we could have been keeping in the corners of our hearts as hidden idols.
Personally, this COVID-induced separation from my local church has not been easy. Even with a renewed perspective now, I know that there may still be days when it’s extra difficult to keep my gaze fixed on the things that matter most. But this season has helped me so much to see “the hidden evils of my heart,” to make my godly affections even more firmly established, and to grow more in the devotion to love and serve God and His people.
And I know I’m not the only one. This magnifying glass—it doesn’t just help you see yourself up close. It helps you get a better glimpse of others as well. And I am just so overwhelmed with the recent turn of events and how, amidst this season of panic and pandemic, the Body of Christ continues to grow. It grows exponentially, even. Growth and development on steroids, so to speak. It’s like the Lord, for the time being, has separated His people to hone them; teach them in the areas they need extra admonishing; rebuke them of their sinful ways and rebuild them towards Christlikeness. All of these things, for now, seem to be done “remotely.” Like individualized classes in preparation for the mainstream one.
But what is more overwhelming for me is the fact that even though we’re all apart, our growth is still toward each other.
My personal lessons may not be exactly the same as another’s, but they all lead to one direction—the growth of the Body in unity in love and truth. It’s an unexpected way, but this season has turned out to be the answer to so many of SGC’s prayers. The prayer for revival; the prayer for purifying and sanctifying God’s people; the prayer for the Elect to be further conformed to the image of His Son and for the deceived and hypocrites to be revealed, that while there is yet time they may turn to real repentance. We have also been praying for more mutual love and care among the brethren; for more opportunities to serve one another and build each other up in love and good works.
And our Heavenly Father is answering all these prayers. Tremendously. Mightily. Overwhelmingly.
We have been the most undeserving recipients of God’s most precious grace, and at a time when so many people feel abandoned by the God they thought they worship, I know for a fact that the exact opposite is true to SGC. The hand of God in this situation is even more evidently at work, His care and loving discipline imprinted upon this world-altering circumstance. He is evidently teaching us and making us grow in grace, albeit in the confines of our own little spaces for now. But because the same Lord and Master is at work in all of our hearts and lives, I can definitely see from where I am that the church is growing together even at a distance. The church is being led to a more experiential knowledge of God’s truth, being guided towards a more Christ-centered mutual ministering in love and care. And I personally cannot help but cry with the psalmist (Ps. 126:3),
The Lord has done great things for us; we are glad.
The Lord, indeed, has done great things to great sinners like us. When I look back at SGC’s 7 years in Intersekt, all I could see is God’s goodness. His amazing grace. His amazing love. All I could see is that “it were a well-spent journey, though sev’n deaths lay between.” And when I look ahead of the many uncertainties that are yet to come, all I could see is God’s faithfulness to His promises. “He has always been faithful to me.” But not just to me as one of His children. But our Father in heaven has always been faithful to every single one of His children, and to His Bride as a whole.
And so as I try to crane my neck to see what’s ahead of us, I don’t feel dread. Instead, I feel the excitement, hope, and calm trust. I can’t wait to see how the Lord, who has always been working in, among, and through His people would lead SGC closer to Him and conform us even more to the image of Christ.
And so, with the recent turn of events, I couldn’t help but feel excited. I’m excited to see what lies behind this old chapter in the life of the church. More so, I am excited to be with the brethren again, not to get our old church life back. But I’m excited to live with the church once more in the real “new normal” after this period of honing. I’m looking forward to being with the members who have grown exponentially in the faith through God’s work of grace in this peculiar season. I’m looking forward to serving one another more, loving one another more, building up and pointing one another to Christ more.
In a sense, I don’t feel nostalgic about losing Intersekt. I don’t long for things to get back the way they used to be, either. Not technically, anyway. Because what I look forward to is seeing how the growth of each member during this time would translate when, once again, we would finally be able to mingle with one another face to face. That is in no way getting back to the old normal. I know for a fact that the Sovereign Grace Church, at the end of this ordeal, would be an exponentially improved version of where we left off when this community quarantine began. A glow-up version, so to speak—only perhaps a hundredfold. And I can’t help but feel excited to see in this new chapter how, once again, the Lord would work in, among, and through His people. I am excited to see how each one has individually grown in grace towards the growth of the church as a whole.
And because of this, I’m standing on my tiptoes.
Because of this, I have eyes glistened with tears—not of sadness, but of overwhelming gratitude.
And I have with me a heart that’s full, a spirit calmed and quieted in the arms of my loving Father, and a childlike gaze fixed upon my Lord and Master, waiting eagerly for the direction to where He would lead us next.
[B&W Photo credits: Ken Maramara]
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